Wednesday 21 March 2007

Being Jack Bloggs

Allow me to introduce myself. The name is Bloggs, Jack Bloggs. To think I am not a Great fan of neither Bond movies nor Shawn Carter.

Hi folks I am completely new to this whole blog thing so forgive me if I bore the hell out of you. I hope not because I was inspired to start writing blogs by Mr. Fine boy whose blogs are funny as hell. I am going to write in a similar pattern to Mr. Fine boy and at the same time aim to be different. To be completely honest it’s difficult to decide whether to do the flashbacks or just share my thoughts generally. I have decided to make it this somewhat of a journal and throw in a few thoughts and flashbacks of my life.

Excuse my rudeness; I haven’t said anything about myself. Nigerian guy in his twenties, lives in London, loves it, do not intend to die here but I would like to go to Nigeria with the confidence and assurance of being successful and living extremely comfortably. Because Omo without money it’s hard to enjoy in that place, but here all you have to do is look for one job, reduce you enjoyment and you’ll be just ok. Most of us here (abroad) have probably been set up for Naij through family connections and stuff, but me it’s a bit shaky. Its not like I don’t come from a good family, but there are one or two complications, maybe even three. But at the end of the day and in the long run it’s really every man for his/herself as we know how people can misuse the funds and connections laid down for them by their folks.

Working habits: I need you guys to come into Jack Bloggs’ world so let me tell you a typical working day for me.

00:01am: Sunday night/Monday morning, getting ready to go to bed – but as a guy you always feel the need to call one babe or the other. Who knows after work one evening this week I might be lucky and she would invite me over, cook for me and erm..., we gist till about 01:30am (when I only planned to ‘yarn’ for like 15 minutes), set alarm on like three different phones for 06:30am and the sleep off.

06:30am: Alarm goes off! Speaking in what is partially my dream and partially reality, I say “God forbid, less than 5 hours sleep when I am going to be working for 8 hours – it does not balance”. Hit the snooze button on each phone as they ring and eventually get up at 07:20am.

08:00am: Out of the house and ready to face the cold, Metro, tube delays, struggling for sit when the train finally comes and nice Oyinbo babes that look sexy in their skirt suits. Finally get to work at 08:45

09:00am to 12:00noon: Facebook, Hotmail, Skysports.com, random websites, checking out some blogs etc, then at certain intervals – Microsoft Outlook just to reply emails, Sageline 500 to get at least some work done.

12:00noon to 01:00pm: My line manager is on his lunch therefore more Facebook, Hotmail, Skysports.com, checking out some blogs etc.

01:00pm to 02:00pm: Lunch time!

02:00pm TO 05:30pm: As much work as possible and counting down each second!

05:45pm: Journey home – the first thing I always look out for on the train in the evening is a copy of the London Lite. I don’t know if it’s just me but that thing beats any other daily tabloid in this town. All their columns from London eye to “Get it off your texts” to Gadget Zone and even their sports section, the London Paper is just depressing. It’s like Ft trying to gossip!

06:30pm till the following day: I just do random things. Which basically is what I will be gisting you guys about every evening because I have a hell of an interesting life!

I am looking forward to feeding you every evening!

8 comments:

Waffarian said...

Hello! Oh boy, I would think finding your way through life yourself is a good thing! Ofcourse having connections and money can only help but men.....if you do everything yourself, that should make you darn proud! Abeg, no apologies.....maybe the people you meet in London are all fortunate to come from well-to-do families, but I can assure they are many others that have put themselves through school and are working hard to have a good life. Bros, I take God beg you, no dey talk that kain thing! ah ah!

WELCOME!

Jack Bloggs said...

waffarian, omo i feel you o! I think you mis-understood me a bit. I obviously was'nt talking for everyone. i have different types of friends you know... The ones that are one thier own and the ones that are 'protected' (if you get my drift)...

Your statement:
"I can assure they are many others that have put themselves through school and are working hard to have a good life." Applies perfectly to me so if at all anything. I DEY FEEL YOU TORY GAN! - One love!

Waffarian said...

Okay bros, i hear, i think say you dey ashamed of we sufferhead people wey dey mange on our own, chei! i be wan scatter you for dis ya blog! hahahahahahah, but as you don "re-arrange" yaself, make i jus welcome you wellu wellu.

BiMbyLaDs** said...

JACKBLOG!! WELCOME TO BLOGNVILLE... make i pray for u small:
1) u will prosper in blogNville
2) anonymous will not locate u

say AMEN o!! eheeen.. no take my prayer joke..
ill be coming more often.. take care and feed us with plenty gist,...

Jack Bloggs said...

Waffirian and Bimbylads, thanks o! Dis Blog tin just dey shack me - in fact gist too much on top am. But its really good cos you read about all different kinds of stuff. I am coming to invade your blogs... Enjoy!

LondonBuki said...

Welcome...

. said...

Men, be like say this fineboy guy don inpsire everybody.

Jack Bloggs said...

Coded yarned you are right o! thanks for dropping by!